How to Handle Criticism While Caregiving
Well-meaning advisers try to help but some can cause hurt
by Barry J. Jacobs, PsyD., AARP, December 29, 2014
Take it from whence it comes
Caregivers would be well-advised (there's that word again) to not
just react to the message being given but to consider the background and
intentions of the messenger. Advisers often have a sincere desire to
help, because they truly are caring and invested. They just don't have
enough information and understanding to know how to actually be helpful.
They are also unaware that their good ideas may come across as
critical. If you express appreciation for their caring, they will
usually feel satisfied that they are making a difference and stop
pressing specific recommendations.
Some people, though, use pieces of advice as thinly veiled barbs. Out
of competitiveness or their own misery, they consciously or
unconsciously mean to take caregivers down a peg. They should be kept at
arm's length. It is seldom worth debating them or giving them the
satisfaction of having caused hurt.
Caregiving Criticism and Unsolicited Advice From Family - AARP